'If my pets have to go, I go too': 22-year-old girlfriend agrees to have her boyfriend's parents live with them for a short time, only for him to tell her that she has to get rid of her loyal cat and dog because his parents don't like them

Author image for Mariel Ruvinsky
Mariel Ruvinsky • Writer and Editor
May 26, 2025 9:00 AM EDT

Cats are the best judges of character. We wholeheartedly believe that. And it is especially true when it comes to romantic partners. Listen to your cats. We have said it before, and we will say it again: cats know. If your cat keeps fighting with your new boyfriend, that's a bad sign, and you should take that seriously. And if your cat falls in love with your new girlfriend, even though he literally doesn't let anyone but his owner touch him, well, that is a sign that should not be ignored either. 

And the beauty of having cats is that not only are they good judges of character, they also often allow people to show their true colors. If a woman abandons her loyal cat of 15 years just because her new boyfriend doesn't like cats, well… maybe she doesn't deserve to have that cat in the first place. And if your boyfriend asks you to rehome your cats because his parents, who you have graciously allowed to live with you until they find a new place, don't like cats… then maybe he should start looking for new places to live as well. 

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  • 01

    "[Am I wrong] for saying I’ll leave if my bf doesn’t let my pets stay while his parents are living with us?"

    "I'll leave if my BF doesn't let my pets stay while his parents are living with us"
    via Unsplash / Madalyn Cox - madalyncox

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    Hi everyone. I (22F) am newly living with my bf (23M) with my dog and my cat. My bf and I have been together for a year and I love him very much. He's incredibly good to me and I'm lucky to have him.
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  • 03
    I've never met his parents, as they live in a different country, nor spoken to them directly since they don't speak English. My bf's parents are looking to move here to the US in the next couple months, and will need to stay with us until they can find a house of their own.
    via Latter_Ad_9324
  • 04
    The problem is that they don't want to live with my pets. My bf thinks I should put my pets in a foster home while his parents are staying with us, and this has caused arguments between us.
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  • 05
    I refuse to leave my pets, as I see them as my family (I had them long before I even met my bf). I have no family or friends that would be willing to take them anyway, so I would be leaving them with a complete stranger if I agreed to his suggestion.
    via Latter_Ad_9324
  • 06
    I've let him know that if my pets have to go, I go too. On one hand, I don't want to put my bf in a position where he has to choose between me and his family. But on the other hand, I don't think it's right to make me get rid of my pets to appease people I don't even know.
    via Latter_Ad_9324
  • 07
    I feel that I'm being gracious enough by agreeing to let his parents stay with us, but their requirement to live in a pet-free home is stepping over the line. What should I do?
    via Latter_Ad_9324
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10509746432
    via Unsplash / Madalyn Cox - madalyncox

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • It's very wholesome to hear that you love this man. That's important. It's good. It's also not the only thing that matters. This is where your relationship is going to be tested - for the better or worse. Cats are family, and asking you to get rid of them so flippantly… red flag. 

  • 09
    Admirable Nothing Time to let the BF go until his parents come and are acclimated and housed safely. But not w you and your pets.
    via Admirable_Nothing
  • 10
    Tight-Shift5706 In this regard OP, be careful. Is bf's culture such that parents move in and expect children to support them. If so, there may be no intention of securing their own separate residence. I don't know if you rent or own, but I'd be very careful. Btw, if they can't tolerate your pets, begin now to explore alternative housing for them when they arrive.
    via Tight-Shift5706
  • 11
    GellyG42 This! They'll potentially move in and never leave, also BF is ok with them making these sorts of decisions about his life doesn't bode well for OP!
    via GellyG42
  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10509746688
    via Unsplash / Madalyn Cox - madalyncox

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • And we don't know what the situation with the parents is, but we have to say that this is a red flag too - about the family as a whole and about your boyfriend in particular. Who even are they to ask you to get rid of your cats because you have graciously allowed them to live with you? 

  • 13
    Only_Music_2640 This! Do not live with him and his parents. Get your own place, keep your pets. Let him sort out his life and his parents.
    via Only_Music_2640
  • 14
    BriefHorror He already picked. He did not pick you. the relationship is a wrap to me. NTA
    via BriefHorror
  • 15
    Cheezburger Image 10509747200
    via Unsplash / Madalyn Cox - madalyncox

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 16
    Sea_Firefighter_4598 NTA, you and your pets live there. Your boyfriend should find a short term rental for the parents because you might be the next thing they object to.
    via Sea_Firefighter_4598
  • 17
    diamondgreene Guuurrrlll. Hes heartless and GTFO before he knocks you up.
    via diamondgreene
  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 10509747456
    via Unsplash / Madalyn Cox - madalyncox

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 19
    KrofftSurvivor NTA Leave. It's easy to be sweet for a year, but now you're seeing your future. His parents come first, and you will be expected to bow to their whims. Tell him you're moving back out to make room for them, and you will not be moving back in until they are in their own place, and watch how fast he changes.
    via KrofftSurvivor
  • 20
    A reasonable man will understand. A man who was planning to manipulate you into just living with his parents and doing what you're told will not be so pleasant.
    via KrofftSurvivor
  • 21
    friendlily NTA. That's your family and that's their house. His parents would be guests and don't get to dictate anything about your home. But this leads me to my second point. It's unlikely that his parents will move out ever. You should cut your losses with this guy and date someone you're more compatible with.
    via friendlily

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boyfriend family drama cat reddit story girlfriend feline Cats parents
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